Portland's Coolest Adults-Only Bed and Breakfast Hotel
Our One-of-A-Kind Answer to Boring, Lonely Hotel Rooms,
and Pre-packaged Same-Ol' Same-Old Hotel Breakfasts
Our One-of-A-Kind Answer to Boring, Lonely Hotel Rooms,
and Pre-packaged Same-Ol' Same-Old Hotel Breakfasts
The hippest Bed and Breakfast in the Northwest.
Surrounded by tall pines,
filled with love, music and memorabilia,
with beds so comfortable that late check-out
has to be the normal check out.
Food so good, you come back
just to be catered to...
We designed our B & B to be
what we always wanted in a hotel retreat.
We want you to know that you can count on us at Happy Rock Inn to follow Covid-Safe practices, providing a safer, sanitary deep-cleaning than most places. We take pride in your safety - and ours.
Due to Florida's irresponsible Covid management, for the time being we are not taking reservations from Florida visitors.
We wanted Happy Rock Inn to be the hotel we always wanted to stay at, and that meant breaking some norms. Little things would become big things to us - because we wanted our guests to know they had come to stay somewhere different. Somewhere they would tell others about. Somewhere they felt a part of. Somewhere cool.
We start with a great, have-fun and social atmosphere. We're LAID-BACK, and ACCEPTING in that Oregon sort of way. Our decor is artsy, musical, and sexy. Celebrities and musicians line the walls. Some of our decor is racy, and for that reason we're generally a 21+ hotel. We love kids so much we don't want to expose them to adult themes and behavior. (And, we don't want the little shits killing the vibe.)
It's common for Guests here get to meet and party with the other guests, plus the staff, the owners, and the neighbors stopping by to have a glass of wine. Everybody is welcome here, though Christian Conservatives tend do get a little uptight at the swingin' good times. We love every person, regardless of who they are or if they're Republican. We say "Be yourself and have a ball. Life is short." Do what makes you happy. Wear what you want to. Kick off your sandals. Prop up your feet. Run around in your jammies. It's the coolest environment. Enjoy some of Oregon's incredible green-ery out on the smoking porch. Get your drink on in our 44 running feet of bar. Ever done a breakfast beer bong? Go ahead, it's cool. Our people are great too - after all, they make the place. It's all good here - as you will see. Breathe deep. Relax.
A Bnb is judged by it's breakfasts, and we take a lot of pride in our incredible farm-to-table breakfasts and guest meals. We raise our own eggs and beef, all-natural with no hormones or antibiotics EVER fed to our animals. In season, we'll serve you vegetables straight from our garden onsite. You can just taste the goodness. Each guest gets a full hot breakfast with coffee, juice or tea included with their room to start the day with. (We also have mimosas and other offerings to help soothe the party from the night before.)
Jim's Bar is available in the afternoon and evening for guests to relax with a book, tea and coffee, or get loose with some of the Northwest's best beers and wines, hand-picked by Michele. Hungry at night? Been travelling all day and need some food when you arrive? No problem! Our menu changes by the week, and it varies by what we have on hand - but it's always HOME-COOKED and spectacular. Gluten free and special diets by request.
Another measure of a bed and breakfast hotel is the comfort of it's beds and rooms. We enjoy taking guests from the stresses of life to relaxing and breathing deep. Our super-comfortable mattresses and blackout drapes make most people want to sleep in late, which is fine by us. Take your time, enjoy the late brunch and check out that are our trademarks.
We offer a variety of amenities to make your stay with us as comfortable as possible. Internet-based TV is available in every room including free Netflix and Amazon Prime, with the option of pay-per-view movies, subscription channels. We provide complimentary high-speed internet access.
Whether this is your first visit, or you have been a guest many times, we want your experience to be excellent. Our staff is always available to help with any questions or concerns you may have.
We wanted to share with you a bit about us and our lives.
We are Jim and Michele James, and our trusty bulldog Twinkie. We bought the place in 2010, and started construction on the GarageMaHall and rock terraces / backyard in 2013. It is a property constantly in motion, and we are always working toward finishing. People are always amazed at what we have built, but we did it with the help of a lot of people. Jim likes working with and teaching kids, as much as his disability will allow. We like to say "This is the house teenagers built..." and it is.
We are soulmates, and want to spend all our time together. We're also social animals. In 2015 Jim was diagnosed with Ehler's Danlos Syndrome, a rare congenital connective tissue disorder that required us to rewire our lives. Our goal is to retire one day to our sailboat.
Our friends, customers and neighbors are our lives. We try to always give of ourselves to our community and to those in need. We host our annual Orphans Thanksgiving Dinner, feeding more than 100 people every year. We host numerous private charity benefit events each year to support and increase what we can do for the Inn and it's work in the community.
Why do we get such great reviews? It's the experience, and it starts with an actual PHONE CALL to reserve a room - not some impersonal internet click. It's just how we roll. Then, our rooms are furnished with great mattresses, premium bedding, and each room comes with a full, hot farm-to-table breakfast that is second to none. And the company? 2nd to none, there are good times ahead!
Our most comfortable and spacious room, it's decorated with some great sexy art, fine Persian rug, and the most comfortable bed in the Lodge. It has an attached bath with shower, and it's own private entrance to our rock-terraced back-40. A 45" High Def Internet TV (Amazon Prime / Netflix).
The perfect suite if you're wanting a romantic getaway, comfort, have a dog, or if you're gonna stay the night at one of our parties.
This room comes with a hot, farm-to-table breakfast for the guests.
A incredibly comfortable Queen Room with a view of the tall Sitka Spruce, Sequoia, and Williamette Valley. 42" Internet TV (Netflix / Amazon Prime). Retro Original Atari TV Games. In Room DVDs. Cool in-room books including One Position A Day Sex Guide.
This room is European style, sharing a full bath with another guest room.
Each room comes with a full, hot, farm-to-table breakfast for the guests.
Our most economical room, The Bunk Room features an adult-sized bunk bed, with a double for 2 on bottom and a single for 1 on top. Come relive your childhood and sleep on the top bunk. (150lb limit). We have adults travel distances to sleep in this cool bed. The room is decorated with sports autographs from Tom Brady to The Portland Trailblazers.
European style room shares a full bath with another guest room.
This room comes with a full, hot, farm-to-table breakfast for 2 guests.
No matter what type of event you're having, we'd love to host it. From weddings to bachelor or bachelorette parties to lodge takeovers for friend reunions, we'd love to have you hold your event here. You won't be disappointed.
Our huge 1200 square foot interior deck bar and party space is the perfect space for your next event. Soundproofed, with incredible ceiling to floor glass garage doors which open to the rock terraces, it's an incredibly beautiful space. Featuring 44' of live-edge dark redwood bar, we furnish the bartender, wait staff and everyone you need for your next party or event. We have a full complement of tables, chairs and party rental options - including p
Pricing upon request and event specifications.
Takeover the entire lodge, and let us take care of you and your party. You get all the bedrooms, plus Aerobeds and cots to sleep up to 12, the entire Bar and Party Space, the grounds, Party Pit, and the staff to take care of your event. We love a great party!
Catering, Food and Beverage extra. Parties limited to guests staying at the lodge. Additional party-goers or events priced based on specs. A full range of party options, including dunk tank, Corn Hole, Beer Pong and more.
We offer many kinds of tours of the area, for groups up to 12.
Offering guided & self-guided kayak tours of local waterways. We hope you're ready for adventure! We can provide a guide who will tell the history, or set you up, show you the basics, get you started and leave you to explore by yourself. Tour the Clackamas River, the Tualatin River or a whole host of other water spots in and around Portland and Mt. Hood.
All equipment provided, including life vests. Our kayaks and paddleboards are entry-level, sit-on-top and great for beginners.
Our BEST tour.
ALL Day guided tour,starting on the original, historic Lewis and Clark Trail, visiting:
Despite some Covid-19 closures (*), see some of the best Portland has to offer, including:
Want to see the best food and drink Portland has to offer? We'll provide the sober driver, transportation, and a guide to take you around to Portland's very best restaurants, bars, food trucks and strip clubs (yes, they have great food) in a 6 hour guided tour.
*Unfortunately, due to Covid-19, this tour is temporarily suspended. We won't offer it unless we can truly take you around Portland to the very best Portland has to offer.*
With more strip clubs than anywhere else,and all fully-nude, full-liquor, and serving food. You'll see couples and singles of both sexes hanging out at our clubs. More great looking tattoos, tits and ass than imaginable. Save trial and error, & let us take you to your choice of Portland's best:
- Original Strip Club, run completely by women
- Best Strip Club, voted 9 times
- Best Dive Bar Locals Strip Club
- Only Steak House Strip Club
- Best Vegan Strip Club
& many more!
*Closed due to Covid*
Portland has more strip clubs AND sex clubs than any other city in America, and we've devised the perfect tour to get you and your partner revved up and ready to go. We'll take you to the very best strip clubs Portland has to offer, get you all charged up, and then take you to the best sex clubs anywhere to get your freak on!
We're not talking sleazy - These are posh nightclubs where you can drink, dance, and be VERY merry. Watch, be watched, or meet others like yourself.
Ready to book with us? Have a question about our rooms or services? We'll be happy to help!
17246 Southeast Oatfield Road, Portland, Oregon 97267, United States
10:00 am – 10:00 pm
It's a big property, and sometimes we're away from the phone or with a customer. Please leave a message or a text and we will return your message ASAP.